Evil Queen
by WednesdaysChild451208
Summary: Megamind kidnaps Roxanne. Rated T to be safe with a semi-graphic death threat and mind control. Pre-movie AU. FREE STORY TO A GOOD HOME
1. Disturbing Shopping List

**In this story Megamind is emotionally at the same point as in the movie just before he starts dating Roxanne as Bernard. But it's pre-movie so he does what any self-respecting super villain does, he kidnaps her and implants her with a mind control chip. Nothing disturbing exept the shopping list. I wish I owned Megamind so I could make some sequels but I don't.**

Megamind was looking dreamily Roxanne. It was a growing tendency that he, though it disturbed Roxanne greatly when she woke up, couldn't quite bring himself to even attempt to stop. She was unconscious but the bag had been removed prematurely. He was deep in thought. *My dear Roxanne could be such an evil queen,* He thought dreamily *she's smart for a human and she sees how my plans are going to fail ahead of time.* Megamind had long had an obsession for Roxanne and would've liked for her to be with him longer than the duration of a kidnapping.

The brilliant plan that he formulated a few years ago once again floats into his mind. If successful, it would give him everything he wanted, except for Metro Man dead of course. This plan would keep her around, Destroy her relationship with Metro Man, show her the joys of being evil, give him the chance to show her how he feels about her, and possibly, but unlikely, convince her to feel the same way. But at the same time, it would completely destroy her life. That was the only reason he had been able to refrain from acting on it, until now.

By this time Roxanne woke up to the more than slightly disturbing sight of Megamind, once again, watching her from the Evil Swivel Chair. "Shouldn't you be turned the other way so you can do your dramatic entrance?" She was annoyed and unimpressed as usual. *Give it up Megamind, your plans never work.*

*My dear Roxanne, have I ever told you that you're pretty when your not impressed?* "Sorry Miss. Ritchi but I have far more horrible plans for you than the usual. See you soon."

*He looks happy, this can't be good...*

"Minion get the spray and take Miss. Ritchi home."

"Yes Sir." *What just happened?* When Minion sprays her Roxanne's world goes black.

When Roxanne wakes up she's still in the invisible car. "Minion?"

"Oh Miss. Richi you're awake, we're almost to your home. I'm sorry about the inconvenience of the unnecessary kidnapping today."

Roxanne sighed, for a super villain's sidekick Minion was awfully polite and all around adorable. "It's ok Minion, I wasn't very excited about that interview with Metro Man anyway."

"you had an interview with Metro Man?"

"Yes, he was going to talk about his new museum and probably say a few heroic one liners so I'm not missing much."

"May I tell Sir you said that?" Minion knew about Megamind's thing for Miss. Ritchi, and even something as small her not looking forward to an interview with her boyfriend would make him happy.

"Sure, just make sure he doesn't tell it to his crowd of hating fans." *Not that they'd believe it.*

"I will, you're home Miss. Ritchi."

"Oh, thank you Minion, so I'll be seeing you later this week?"

"Probably. Goodbye Miss. Ritchi."

"Goodbye Minion." As she walked away she wondered what 'far more horrible plans' Megamind had in store. *Whatever it is it'll fail miserably.* Roxanne was certain about that. It was the one thing that was most predicable about Megamind, besides the robots, lasers, and spikes, he always lost. It was an official part of the game he and Metro Man played, Megamind designs another plan to kill Metro Man, he kidnaps her and tries to scare her, he calls Metro Man, Metro Man rescues her, Megamind is sent back to prison, he eventually escapes and they do it all again.

When Minion returned to Evil Lair he found his master/friend/brother/thingy in a frenzy. Minion had seen Megamind in many frenzy's before but this was different. He was even more absorbed in this, so absorbed that he didn't hear Minion's footsteps. Minion didn't understand it so he looked at the new hanging wall Megamind was working on. He didn't understand most of it, but he saw Miss. Ritchi's name repeatedly. Minion was confused so he used the trick his master made for him. When Minion looked at a hanging wall from a distance a picture would form that showing the henchman the main idea without him having to interrupt his master's latest breakthrough.

When Minion uses the trick on this wall Miss. Ritchi's image appears, but that wasn't the shocking part, most of their plans did involve the reporter after all, the part that made Minion jump in suprise was that Miss. Ritchi was wearing something similar to his master's costume but it was purple. *This cannot be good.*

Megamind heard him jump. "Oh Minion good you're back. I need you to go run some errands."

"Does it have anything to do with... this?"

"Yes it's a very important part of this." Minion pulls out a notepad. "We need some anesthetic, furniture, an autopsy table, purple paint, an IV, material, a doctor, and some candles."

"I'm assuming the autopsy table is for Miss. Ritchi."

"Yes it is the unpleasant part of my very evil plan that I warned her about."

Minion didn't often worry about Miss. Ritchi, he knew Megamind would never purposely hurt Roxanne, it was part of the game, not to mention the thing Megamind had for her of which we do not speak; but it was also part of the game that his plans would always end in horrible failure. "Sir I think this is a bad idea, and I don't even know what the idea is!" *Unless it's that one basic idea for a plan. Please don't let it be that one!*

Megamind sighed, he knew his minion/friend/brother/thingy wouldn't approve of the plan, but he really wanted to do it; he really wanted it to work, more than he ever wanted his plans to kill Metro Man to work. "The idea is to implant a mind control chip into Miss. Ritchi to keep her here, together we'll turn her to the dark side, and we'll break Metro Man's heart in the process, simple." *Might as well give an argument as to how this will help kill Metro Man to make it sound a little more logical to Minion.*

"Sir there are so many ways that that plan could explode in your face the probability of failure is over one hundred!"

"And since when has that ever stopped me?" Megamind gave Minion a look that made it clear he wouldn't be persuaded by any reasonable argument.

Minion gave up, he'd just have to do damage control later. "Yes Sir." Minion left to gather the items and person on the grocery list. *This is going to go horribly wrong.*

Minion returned a few hours later to find his master jumping around and laughing hysterically. "This is going to work! MWAHAHAHA!"

"Of course it's going to work Sir." All of his master's plans were foolproof, unless they involved Metro Man, they were foolproof but they failed anyway. Minion believed the plan would work so he wasn't lying, but he just knew somehow it was going to blow up in his master's face. *Might as well be supportive.*

"Minion you get started with Miss. Ritchi's outfits, and her bedroom things, I'll take care of the doctor."

The doctor woke up in a dark room. The only light was a spotlight aimed at a chair in the center of the room similar to the one he was in. Also in the room was a high backed leather swivel chair, shortly it's occupant turned the chair to face him. "Hello doctor."

"Megamind!" The doctor was panicking, he'd seen the villain on TV before, but he never in a million years expected to meet him in person.

"Correct, let me explain your situation, because it's much worse than you know."

*How could it possibly be any worse.* "What do you want?"

"Have you noticed the very obvious chair in the middle of this room?" Megamind didn't bother giving him the chance to answer. "It for all intents and purposes belongs to Roxanne Ritchi. My evil henchman will be picking her up soon, she is going to be your patient."

"What?"

"You are going to help me install a chip where her brain meets her spinal chord. If anything goes wrong, and Miss. Ritchi sustains any permanent harm your death will so hideous and painful you human mind cannot even begin to comprehend it. Any questions or comments?"

Roxanne woke up in evil lair, she was laying on her side on an autopsy table. When Minion had kidnapped her she was suprised and confused. *What's going on? They usually stop at one kidnapping a day.* She noticed that she was untied so she tried to move but couldn't. Megamind was watching her, though more intensely and less glazed over, again.

"Good evening Miss. Ritchi, I see you're awake."

"Tell me something that isn't blatantly obvious."

He laughed, not an evil or mocking laugh, but like he honestly found her comeback funny. He nodded at someone behind her. "Miss. Ritchi If you feel anything or if anything changes say so."

"Why? What is going on?"

"I'll answer your questions later, just please?"

Roxanne wasn't happy at being left in the dark, particularly by a super villain who always gloats about every detail of his latest evil plan to her, but because of the obvious concern on his and Minion's faces she agreed. *I'm sure they'll gloat about every detail later.* She heard power tools behind her head but wasn't particularly concerned. Despite what he'd like her to believe she knew that he would never hurt her, that was the one thing that made the game so comical.

Megamind disappeared behind her. He stood next to the shaking doctor, "Stop shaking, you'll hurt Roxanne and then..." Megamind didn't even need to finish, through sheer force of will the doctor stilled himself. Megamind picked the chip up out of the basin of alcohol and carefully pressed it to the base of Roxanne's brain. The little device sprouted tentacles that connected themselves to the rest of her brain. He couldn't help the little swell of satisfaction that came when his inventions worked, particularly this most important one.

He then walked back in front of Roxanne. *Almost done my dear.*

They waited a few minutes in silence until the doctor said "It's done." He said it like he'd just killed her.

"Goodnight Roxanne." Megamind said before he motioned for Minion to knock-out -spray her. *Have pleasant dreams.*

Roxanne was still semi-conscious when Megamind said, "Congratulations doctor, you get to live."

Megamind was relieved, the operation went well, he didn't have to come up with a horrible-death machine for the doctor, and soon he could start his plan to win over Roxanne. "Minion take the doctor home, I'll take care of Roxanne."

"Yes sir!" Minion was happy to get the doctor home, it had been years since they had a hostage that was actually afraid. And it was the absolute first time they had a hostage in actual danger, Minion didn't doubt his master would've found a horrible way to kill the doctor if anything had went wrong.

After Minion had left with the now unconscious doctor Megamind started an IV for Roxanne. He intended to keep her unconscious for a while so she could heal and would be in less pain when she woke up. Megamind wheeled the autopsy table Roxanne was on to his room. He dragged in her bed with the purple fitted sheet, black sheet, and purple blanket with black lightening bolts; and he dragged out his bed with a similar bed set only blue and black to the Idea room, *it's not like I sleep much anyway.* He returned to his room and put Roxanne in her bed carefully. Megamind looked at her sleeping form with a lovesick look on his face. He wondered if she knew she had the two most potentially dangerous people on the planet wrapped around her finger.

He reluctantly left her to go work on the other parts of the plan. He ordered some brain bots to start working on her room. He went to the idea room to plan his next move. So far things were going perfectly, for once, and the dangerous part of the plan was done. He reviewed some of her news reports he had recorded. After he finished her second interrogation he decided that he was going to be completely honest with her. That was his last coherent mental decision before he got lost in the reports.

He jumped when Minion returned. "AHHH! Minion you startled me!"

"Sorry Sir."

"It's ok Minion."

"How is Miss. Ritchi?"

"She's asleep. I want to keep it that way for a while, let her recover."

"Good idea Sir, by the way what's the plan?"

"I have no idea! But I do know what we need to do next."

Please review!


	2. Last Friday Night

**Ok I have decided that there was a prequel of some sort that set them on the course for this, feel free to write that one. My avatar is a picture that I warped to go with my story so please tell me what you think. This chapter is about Roxanne waking up, next chapter she starts on the road to becoming an Evil Queen. Please review it makes me feel warm and fuzzy inside to know anyone cares!**

They kept Roxanne unconscious for the next week. During this time Minion was busy designing and making feminine versions of his master's usual outfit. He made most of them in purple but he also made one each in pink, red, and blue.

Megamind alternated between directing work on her room and sitting by her bed, spray can ready, plotting out how exactly he was going to turn her to the dark side and more importantly, convince her to love him back. When he first decided on mind control the idea of using it to make her fall for him had crossed his mind. But he quickly rejected the idea, he was evil but he had standards.

Four days into this new chaotic routine and Megamind simply had to leave Evil Lair. Roxanne's room was almost finished so he no longer had that excuse to delay his visit to Roxanne's apartment and pick up some of her things she might miss otherwise, and they were completely out of coffee. Megamind was comforted by the fact that Roxanne was safely inside Evil Lair and not at her easily-broke-into apartment. He'd ordered Minion not to leave her alone there for any reason. And her brain bot was watching her.

He had made that brain bot for her 12 years ago when some unfortunate soul made the mistake of breaking into her apartment. He was still dehydrated in a drawer somewhere in Evil Lair. Since then the pink brain bot had been following and protecting Roxanne.

Megamind pulled up to her apartment building in the invisible car. Now came the hard part. Roxanne's doorman was unusually dedicated and vigilant, which was both a blessing and a curse for Megamind. He was glad that there was someone that protected her from the stupider of the many other villains who tried to kidnap his damsel, but the doorman was a little bit of a nuisance for him to get past.

Usually he could just use the communicator watch and claim to be a friend of hers, but she's been missing for a while now so Megamind was going to have to use a more subtle approach. He opened the door, and before the poor doorman could react, Megamind dehydrated him. Afterwards he got into the elevator to go to Roxanne's apartment. *So far so good.* He was so familiar with how to pick her door's lock it took only a few seconds and he was inside.

He went through her apartment gathering things that seemed to have sentimental value to Roxanne. When he looked at the items he'd gathered he realized that wasn't very much. He went back to her bedroom to get some of her night clothes, to her kitchen to find her human medicines, and left.

When Roxanne woke up in a dark bedroom in Evil Lair, the first things she realized were that her head hurt, she had been out for a long time, and the way Megamind was always watching her when she wakes up from unconsciousness brought about by less-than-natural causes was disturbing.

"Good morning Roxanne, how do you feel?" Megamind asked even faster than Minion.

Roxanne realized she was still untied when her hand reached to cradle her throbbing head. "My head is killing me." She became suspicious "What did you do to me?" The confusion wasn't helping the pain in her head. Why wasn't she tied up, last time it was because they had somehow paralyzed her, but they hadn't this time. Also confusing, why was she in was appeared to be Megamind's bedroom? And why was he so concerned about how she felt. *Did Minion drop me again?*

Minion spoke up "We were prepared for that, Sir brought back all of your medicine from when he went through your apartment."

"Minion!" Megamind was horrified that his well-intentioned best friend had given away that he had went through her apartment so early in the execution of the plan.

Roxanne waited for the rush of anger at Megamind's invasion of her home and privacy, when it didn't come the suspicion of as to why her head hurt doubled. "Why am I not trying to kill you for breaking into my apartment?"

"I'll answer your question in a moment, here's your medicine."

Roxanne got out some Ibuprofen. "Can I have some water?"

"Yes Miss. Ritchi." Minion left for the water.

"I'm sure you're very confused Roxanne so I'll make you a deal, for every one of your questions I answer you answer one of mine." Megamind knew that this deal gave her the upper hand, but he did it anyway because he wanted to help Roxanne make her place in this new love/hate hexagon, that's how he thought of everyone in his life. The mindless drones hated him and loved Metro Man; Metro Man loved Roxanne and hated evil, which Megamind was affiliated with; Minion brotherly/parentally/whateverly-loved him and hated Metro Man; Warden hated him and also hated life in general; He loved Roxanne and hated the mindless drones; and Roxanne loved Metro Man and hated him. Megamind hoped to drastically change the hexagon.

"Ok what did you do to me?"

*The nosy reporter had to start with the hardest question!* "I implanted a mind control chip in your head."

Roxanne knew she should be furious but she wasn't. If anything Roxanne wanted to reassure him that it was ok and that she wasn't mad. *Stop it Roxanne! That's what he did to you, he's making you feel sorry for him!*

At that moment Minion reentered the room with a glass of water. "Here you go Miss. Ritchi."

"Thank you Minion." When Roxanne took the pills she couldn't help but notice Megamind's soft, relieved sigh.

As the room lapsed into silence Minion noticed the tense atmosphere. "Well I'll leave now..." Minion said as he fled the room. *Good luck Sir!*

"My turn, What is your favorite color?" *Please be purple.*

Roxanne thought he was joking until a few seconds passed and he was still waiting for an answer. "Purple."  
>Megamind smiled hugely. *Yes!*<br>"Why are you so happy my favorite color is purple?"

"You will find out later, you may ask another question."

"How much does this chip control me?" *Might as well find out the holes in his plan.*

"The chip has three settings, setting one controls emotions, setting two controls emotions and actions, and setting three controls everything. Right now it's on setting two, that means no leaving Evil Lair; no attacking me, Minion, or my inventions; no tampering with the chips control panel; and no telling anyone outside Evil Lair about the chip. As far as emotions go, no being sad or angry."

"That's oddly... reasonable." Roxanne expected the list to be much longer and most of the things on it she would never do anyway.

"What are your favorite things to consume?"

*What's with the harmless questions?* "To drink I like coffee, white wine, and hot chocolate; to eat I like Special K cereal, chicken salad, baked potatoes, and ice cream." Roxanne had to hold back a laugh when she saw how absorbed he was in their conversation. "When did you come up with this evil plan?"

"The last time I kidnapped you... kidnapping number 1,541." Megamind wondered if she would think it was weird that he kept track of all the times he kidnapped her. "What is your favorite kind of music?"

Roxanne blushed, she had grown to like the music blaring from his assorted doom machines, either because she actually deep down enjoyed it in the first place but had suppressed her opinions in favor of something more acceptable in the publics opinion, or she had developed a taste for it to survive the constant exposure that came with being kidnapped over fifteen hundred times by Metro City's personal super villain. "Classic Rock... So I'm going to be here a while?" Roxanne asked as nonchalantly as possible, strangely unenthused at the idea of hurting her kidnapper / host's feelings.

Despite her efforts Megamind's face fell. "yeah." He sat down on the corner of her bed and after glancing at her to see if the action was acceptable her rested his head in his hands. *Maybe Minion was right about this being a bad idea...*

Roxanne felt the strange displeasure at seeing him unhappy again. Hesitantly she got up, walked over (inwardly berating herself for the stupidity of what she was about to do the whole way), and sat down next to him. "It's ok, I'll stay." He looked up when she put a hand on his shoulder. "Megamind do you have anymore questions?" Roxanne knew it probably wasn't the brightest thing in the world to invite someone as supposedly evil as Megamind to ask her questions, she also knew it probably wasn't the brightest thing in the world to be sitting next to the alien who kidnapped her 1,542 times, and trying to make him feel less bad about implanting her with a mind controlling device.

"Would you like a tour of Evil Lair?"

*It probably would be a good idea to get familiar with this place...hate to cut Megamind's plan short by getting killed.* "Sure."


	3. Never More Fantastic

**This story is going to be light and fluffy with a hint of cynism... just thought you should know. LOL :)**

They were wandering around Evil Lair on no logical course. They would stop and Megamind would monologue about his inventions on the rare occasions Roxanne's inquisitive reporter mind didn't force her to ask the questions that she was trying to resist asking for fear of inflating Megamind's already considerable ego.

They were in the observatory when Roxanne asked "Don't you think Metro Man is going to look for me?" *If not than this is the standard blatantly obvious hole in your plan that you always overlook.*

Megamind visibly deflated, he'd been doing a fairly good job of putting that part of the plan out of his oversized mind until she'd asked the question. Whether she knew it or not it was completely against every instinct he had to put her in pain's way, so that necessary part of the plan was making him feel distinctly horrible. "Yes I'm sure he will, but I'm going to take care of it... oh look the exciting room!" *I'll have to thank Minion later for choosing that exact spot for it.*

Megamind raced ahead to distract her and Roxanne, very amused at his adorable chibi antics, followed content that she'd find out what the plan was soon enough. *Megamind you're a super villain, super villains aren't allowed to act so sweet and innocent.*

The Exciting Room was as exciting as it's name implied, with the original combination of alligators and disco. While looking down at the alligators and their chew toys Roxanne's conviction that this tour was a good idea so as to avoid dying horribly was confirmed. Megamind now looked like more of a villain. He was still as giddy as any self respecting six year old, but now that giddyness was directed at five oversized alligators.

The wandered some more until they were in sight of an exit, or another Exciting Room. What Roxanne had started thinking of as the smart part of her mind urged her to run for it, Megamind's predictability levels were at an all time low so it would be best to leave immediately. But there was the slight problem caused by the manifestation of Megamind's recent unpredictability.

"Doubting the effectiveness of my invention Roxanne?"

Roxanne realized she had been staring at the exit / other Exciting Room for some time now. She turned slowly to him and was relieved when she saw his customary evil smirk.

Megamind had plastered on a random expression when she had turned around. If there was any honesty in the world he was disappointed she wasn't enjoying the events after her awakening as much as she'd led him to believe. *Nice try my dear Roxanne, but your tricks won't work on me.*

"No, I want to see what happens." *You got a problem with honest curiosity villain?*

"Nosy reporter." The evil smirk became more natural. "Have fun!"

Roxanne was nervous as she walked toward the exit, *Horde of killer Brain Bots? Electrical shock? Lasers?* None of the options would have surprised her. On her way to the door she was alternately praying, cursing her overly developed inquisitivity that made her have to know what would happen, and swearing never to call Megamind predictable ever again.

When she reached the door she lost control of herself and was simply incapable of going further. It was very anticlimactic and completely unexpected. "No spikes or lasers? I didn't think you had it in you."

"Not all of my things have spikes and lasers." *Yes! Witty banter! Good start Roxanne, but I'll win this time!*

"You're right, the unicorn had a horn not a spike."

"Equestrinator!"

"Then why did it have a horn?" *I have you now Megamind!*

"It was not a horn it was a... spike." *Oh well, I'll win next time.*

"MWAHAH-" Roxanne decided it would be inappropriate to Evil Laugh in front of a super villain. It would be bad if he got the impression that she'd practiced it, especially since she had. "-HA HA HA! I win!"

They went into a dark room that was mostly empty except two chairs and the Evil Swivel Chair. "Brain Bots get those out of here for Daddy."

"Daddy?"

*Oops*

Megamind turned pink, which considering his normal shade was an accomplishment. "Be careful temptress, or I'll have them thinking of you as Mommy."

Roxanne froze. *Temptress, Mommy?* Roxanne had a suspicion as to what the goal of his plan was. *How many times has he asked me to be his evil queen?* Too many for comfort she decided. *I have to get out of here NOW!* The smart part of her mind screamed. But her body wouldn't obey, not because the implant's strings were stopping her, but because she didn't want to. She thought back to the times she had pondered what things would be like if, in some crazy alternate reality, she had accepted Megamind's offers to be his evil queen. *I'd be kidnapped a lot less, wouldn't have to put up with the facade of being Metro Man's girlfriend anymore...*

"Roxanne?" Megamind had a good idea of what she'd suspected.

"Yes?" Roxanne felt sick with what she was doing, willfully being a part of Megamind's plan was very different than sitting on the sidelines waiting for Metro Man to 'save' her. She'd thought about being more active in their battles, but that had usually consisted of actually resisting being kidnapped, which she had stopped bothering to do after the first few times, not joining Megamind and helping him kill Metro Man.

"Do you feel like trying on some outfits? I mean it can wait if you don't and I completely understand if-" He was in full babbling mode, she was supposed to find out shortly, but the horror from that realization was supposed to be drowned out by the shock from the city turning on her. *At least she's not screaming.*

"Yeah I'm fine." *There'll be time to drown in self loathing for going along with this later when I'm not in front of him.*

There was a knocking on the door.

"Come in Minion!"

Minion walked in and immediately noticed Roxanne's state. "She knows about-"

"Yes."

Roxanne put on a happy mask and tossed aside her true emotions, that were currently in a tangled mess, if she was going to go along with this, at least for a while as an experiment, she was going to enjoy it. *This is the stupidest thing I will ever do.* The smart part of her mind thought as she said "Bring out the outfits Minion."

"Yes Miss. Ritchi!" Minion skipped out of the room.

"I was previously unaware that his robot body was capable of skipping." Megamind said after a minute, still looking like he'd seen an apparition.

Roxanne never believed that she'd be comparing Minion, a villain's minion and alien fish in a gorilla robot body, with a little school girl, it was strangely easy.

"Sir. I'm back." The fish was whistling now.

"Oh good. Roxanne we'll be outside while the Brain Bots get you dressed." *And by the way when did you aquire the ability to whistle?*

"Brain Bots get me dressed?" Roxanne could see a million ways as to how that could go wrong.

"Don't worry, they're good at it, and getting dressed yourself is almost as impossible as killing Metro Man." They left before she could argue further.

She eyed the gathering Brain Bots warily. Once she got over the fear that they were going to bite her or tear her arms off it wasn't that bad, apart from the fact that the Brain Bots seemed sentient, which wasn't helping with the awkwardness of the situation, and that their eyes looked a little too much like video cameras for comfort, but she was fairly certain Megamind wasn't that low.

The awkwardness diminished as they went through the long process of putting on her purple and black cape, purple and grey outfit, spiked gloves, and boots. Somehow the strange assemble managed to be very pretty. Roxanne was confident that she could get used to the process, if she decided to stick with her decision to stay for a while.

"Megamind, Minion, they're done!" She said as she applied some eyeliner, it would be a while before she trusted them with that.

When Megamind entered he was amazed, he had pictured this moment countless times over the years and knew it would be a pretty picture, but he never believed that heroes' girlfriend and overall good girl Roxanne Ritchi could pull off evil so well. "Roxanne...wow."

Roxanne was happy with his succinct praise. She looked to Minion who was somewhere between Megamind's state and smug with the indirect praise of his work. Up until that point she had never condoned their works of evil, no matter how impressive. *Aw, why not? Minion needs an ego boost.* "Thank you Minion, it's very pretty."

"Thank you Miss. Ritchi!"

Megamind suddenly looked somber. He knew it was time to execute the unpleasant part of the plan, it was an imperative lesson for Roxanne to learn, but he hated to ruin the happy moment.

Minion and Roxanne noticed his mood. "What's wrong Sir?"

"I wasn't lying last week when I said I had far more horrible plans than the usual for you."

"What?" So far his plan had been unusual and not even remotely predictable, but not horrible.

"It's time for your crash course in hatred of humanity. Minion?"

"Yes Sir." Minion started fiddling with a joystick like device. He turned away from his master and Miss. Ritchi so they wouldn't see him cry. He'd watched his master go through the realization that people behind their warm exterior were cold and vicious, it was horrible enough. But Miss. Ritchi is much more connected to the world than his master was, which was just going to make this lesson that much more painful.

"I'm sorry Roxanne, I know this is a hard lesson, but you'll be all the better off for it in the end." Megamind thought back to his own lesson in hatred for humanity. He was soothed with the thought that Roxanne was going to have himself and Minion to help her get through it, until he realized that probably wasn't much to her.

Roxanne was deeply unsettled by their sudden mood change, and the term "crash course in hatred for humanity" was raising alarms in her mind.

She was distracted from her train of thought when suddenly the strings reestablished their control. "Megamind what happened?"

The innocent bewilderment in her voice almost made Megamind order Minion to cancel the plan, find the forget me stick to bash the days events out of her memory, and send her home to the hypocritical goodness that made up everything around her in her normal life, almost. "This part of the plan requires level three. Is that ok?"

"Yeah it's fine, it just feels strange at first." Roxanne knew that normally she would never be so agreeable about this kind of thing. She watched as Megamind pushed some buttons turning on a monitor showing the crowd gathered for the annual Metro City Against Crime festival.

"Ollo Metrocity, I am interrupting whatever dreary things that you normal people are doing to announce that Roxanne Ritchi has accepted my offer to be my evil queen!"

Roxanne smirked at him *They'll never believe that.* The strings pulled her over to where he was standing.

The crowd seeing that she had apparently turned evil, didn't question it but started booing at them.

*Ok, maybe they would.* Roxanne searched the crowd for anyone of relative intellect and saw many people she knew, that five seconds ago she would have called her friends. All coherent thought left her as the room started spinning. *Thank goodness Metro Man isn't here... I don't think I could take their bantering right now.*

Megamind noticed that she was about to fall and grabbed her hand purely to hold her up, doing his best to make it look otherwise for the sake of presentation. "Rest assured Metrocity, you'll be seeing more of us real soon." He motioned for Minion to cut the feed. "Roxanne are you ok?" *I forgot where I put the blueprints for the Forget Me Bomb so this is a permanent thing.*

Roxanne didn't know how she felt. She knew that, without mechanical intervention, she was angry at Megamind for ruining her life; that she was angry at the people of Metro City for being so stupid and believing everything they heard; at her self for being so blind as to have trusted them not to turn on her; and depressed that the place that she had made for herself in the world was gone, and that if she left Evil Lair she would have no where to go.

And there was the emotion she could truly feel: there wasn't anything she could do now to worsen Metro City's opinion of her, so now she was free to do anything she wanted, and there was no one who could stop her.

Including Megamind's implant now that she had a plan as to how to get around it.

Roxanne at this point felt like she had gained out of the recent turn of events, not depressed as though she'd lost everything. *After all what did I really lose?* She reasoned with herself *Some friends that would turn on me in an instant and are so stupid they'd believe anything they're told; the approval of the city, and the obligations that come with it.*

"No I'm not ok. I don't think I've ever felt more fantastic than I do right now."


	4. No Longer Available

**Whew this chapter took a while. But I have a legitamate excuse, we're all about excuses here, I was busy on my picture depicting a future story thing. I am now a deviant yay me! Here's a link:**

**http : / / wednesdays child 45120 . deviantart . com /#/d4be9zw**

Megamind was in a daze as he followed Minion who was introducing Roxanne to all of the Brain Bots, the other machines, and showing her which of the blinky dials did anything. He could not believe it had gone so well and that Roxanne had embraced being hated by Metrocity with such grace. *Typical Roxanne, always making me feel stupid despite the fact I'm smarter than you are physically capable of being.*

Roxanne wasn't sure about her new predicament, she knew the instant she was alone she was going to call her parents and tell them the truth. She didn't care about Metro City's opinion of her so long as they knew. But for now she obligingly followed Minion as he introduced her to thousands of menacing cyborgs that were strangely similar to puppies.

That went on for a few hours, Roxanne truly believed that if she heard about the name or biting tendencies of another Brain Bot her head was going to explode, it wasn't helping that the Ibuprofen was probably wearing off by now. "Minion I hate to cut this short but my head is starting to hurt again." *Perfect.*

Megamind practically dragged her to his room. "Roxanne I'm going to the store to pick up some things. You take a nap while I'm gone." Things were going better than he'd hoped, so he decided to fast forward to the next part of his plan.

"Ok good night, evening, whatever time it is."

"It's six thirty pm Miss. Ritchi." Minion said helpfully.

"Thank you Minion."

When they were gone she got her phone off Megamind's dresser, to discover the battery had died. *Aw come on, were's a working phone when you need one. And why is it dead? It was fully charged when they kidnapped me...*

Roxanne realized she had no idea what day it was. *And more disturbing, how long have I been asleep at Evil Lair?* She'd ask about it later, but for now she had the problem with the phone.

"You there!"

The Brain Bot bowged as if to say "Who, me?"

A pink Brain Bot beside him *I can't believe I'm thinking of it as a him.* Pushed him forward.

"Yes you. Can you charge a phone?" To Roxanne's amazement the Brain Bot picked the phone out of her hand and connected it to what Roxanne supposed was a power outlet on another Brain Bot's dome.

"Thank You. Now 561?"

It bowged a "Yes?"

"You record everything you hear right?"

It nodded.

"Good. Replay Daddy's words: turn, off, control, panel, for, Roxanne. 782, you record them." It all was going according to plan as the Brain Bots unwittingly helped her get around their Daddy's device.

"Now 782 listen carefully, do not be seen by the other Brain Bots. When you go to the Control Panel Room (or at least that's what Roxanne thought of it as) replay the words I told you to record." The plan worked without further complication.

"You have 548 unheard messages." The phone's monotonous voice said it as though that was a perfectly normal amount of messages for one person to receive.

Roxanne stopped listening to the full message after the first few declarations of eternal hatred and started just deleting them after confirming by voice that it wasn't her parents.

She did this until one message, "Roxanne this is your mother, we don't know what's gotten into you but until you straighten up don't call us."

Roxanne tried to call them and explain that nothing had gotten into her, that it was just Megamind's latest evil plan.

"The number you are calling is no longer available." The phone's monotonous voice in complete contrast to the shock and horror welling up inside her.

Roxanne collapsed onto the floor, and sincerely wished it would swallow her up. *Where is that "mothers love their children no matter what," even if said what is turned evil and joined Megamind, now?* The dam she had made with her closed eyelids broke releasing her tears, and what was left of her composure was gone.

Megamind was on his way back to Evil Lair when Minion called. "Sir Miss. Ritchi is crying."

"What? That's not possible. Why is she crying?"

Minion was not surprised that his master could in all seriousness call something impossible and then immediately ask how it was happening, he'd seen him do it after almost every failed battle with Metro Man. "I don't know why Sir."

"I'll take care of it when I get there." Megamind wasn't far from Evil Lair and after a few minutes of traveling 240 mph he was there. He went straight to where Roxanne was still on the floor.

Roxanne didn't know how he got there, but one moment she was all alone in her misery and the next Megamind was there helping her up onto her bed. Normally Roxanne would object to being comforted by a super villain who single handedly ruined her life, but no one else was volunteering. *This has to be irony in its purest form.*

Megamind had no idea what to do, he'd never comforted anyone before. *Where's Minion when you need him?* Roxanne's bangs were in her eyes, so he decided to start by brushing them to the side like he'd seen her do at the end of every kidnapping and during her news report on said kidnapping.

Roxanne initially thought he'd tasered her as a way of knocking her out when Megamind pushed her hair back into place. Even more so when, by their own accord, her arms wrapped around him.

Megamind thought he'd broken some human taboo when Roxanne half lunged at him, until he realized he was receiving his first hug from someone other than Minion. Megamind didn't dare move, if he did Megamind was afraid that Roxanne would realize who she was hugging and let go.

He didn't want to ruin the moment by talking, but there was something that had to be done that, under the current circumstances, he felt less guilty about doing then he had from the start of the plan. "Minion code: turn on the implant control panel."

Roxanne felt her emotional turmoil subside, and supposed that Minion had turned the panel back on. But she didn't care, so long as she didn't have to feel that pain again Roxanne would happily stay in Evil Lair forever.

Eventually Roxanne must have fallen asleep because the next thing she knew she was under her blankets and alone. *Who tucked me in? It doesn't seem like the thing Megamind would do, though he has been unpredictable lately...*

She left his room to find Megamind but found Minion in the kitchen instead. "Good whatever it is Minion."

Minion jumped three feet in the air. He had been certain that based on her earlier state that she'd still be asleep when his master returned. But no, Minion was alone with the former reporter who at any time may ask him to turn the implant off. He liked Miss. Ritchi and wanted to make her happy, but he simply couldn't hurt his master like that again.

"Good morning Miss. Ritchi!" He said in an octave that told Roxanne exactly where his mind was.

*I could toy with him, and it'd be so much fun... no, I shouldn't do that to Minion.* "Minion?"

Minion jumped again *I knew she'd ask, I knew it! Oh where is the knock out spray when you need it?* "Yes Miss. Ritchi?"

"I'm not going to ask you to go against Megamind." *It's not like I have anything to go back to.*

Minion's robot body visibly relaxed.

"Hey Minion one more thing... would you mind if I attacked you?"

"Of course not Miss. Ritchi." Minion watched Miss. Ritchi collect a wrench from a small cart, he briefly noted the same hyper active frenziness that so frequently characterized his master. Minion did a double take at the broken mirror behind the cart and shuddered at the memories that flooded his mind.

Roxanne was returning with a wrench so Minion mentally shook the thoughts out of his mind. *Now is not the time for negativity. I can't let Roxanne find out about that with her nosy reporter skills.*

Roxanne was about to bring the wrench down on his bowl when she noticed he was barely watching. "You're very confident in Megamind's..." She pointed to the side of her head "whatever million syllable word you call it."

"Actually we just call it the implant. Or just it, that's forbodeing enough for my taste. And of course I'm confident, Sir's inventions never fail."

Roxanne was confused, the last time she checked they'd lost every battle with Metro Man they ever had, except that one time when Metro Man had bad phone service and didn't know to show up. "Minion I hate to shatter whatever fantasy world your living in, but Megamind's inventions always fail."

"Oh they don't fail Miss. Ritchi, they're just useless against Metro Man." He said bitterly. *Evil hero, you always just have to ruin everything my master does, even all those years ago before he went evil you were there, destroying everything.*

Minion looked so depressed by whatever train of thought Roxanne had advertently led him to that she just had to distract him. She brought the wrench down hard on his bowl suddenly and without warning.

To Roxanne and Minion's surprise it made contact with the bowl but it didn't shatter. "Oh Miss. Ritchi I forgot to mention my bowl isn't made of normal glass. It's actually a type of gaseous solid."

"What?" Roxanne was familiar with liquids, gases, solids, and plasmas; gaseous solids, not so much.

"On our planet gaseous solids were commonly used in spacecraft shields, it was what my original bowl was made of. Sir altered it chemically to make it stronger to protect me."

Roxanne was intrigued by Minion's words and the slightly glazed over, but happy, expression on his face. "You really care about Megamind don't you?"

"Yes Miss. Ritchi."

She saw the perfect opportunity to toy with the poor fish. *I'm sorry for what I'm about to do to your fragile little mind Minion.* "Do you have any friends other than Megamind?"

"The Brain Bots are good company to me while Sir is plotting."

Roxanne feigned hurt while suppressing the growing smirk that was threatening to emerge. *I have you now Minion!* "You don't think of me as a friend?"

Minion's eyes went wide. "No.. I mean, yes.. I mean... I didn't want to be assumptive."

Minion's level of insecurity caused Roxanne to lose interest in stringing him along further. "Oh Minion you have got to be the sweetest evil minion there ever was."


	5. Hug Please?

**Whew, all done! Not much happens in this chapter, but it's here to set the stage for the next one. Warning: a lot of Minion being cute in this chapter. In other news, to those who missed the author's note I had previously posted, I have made a prequel that explains what brought him to this. So as of now they are both OOC. Unless they just forgot to mention this in the movie, I mean it would explain a lot. I am going to alter the begining of the story to go with where my story is headed. I'll put the links at the bottom for the Prequel and the pictures. Please review!**

The moment was too sweet for Minion, who could no longer resist picking Roxanne up in a hug. The move knocked the air out of her lungs, but Megamind didn't strike her as the hugging type, so she said nothing.

Less than a minute later Roxanne thought she was going to pass out, but luckily Megamind chose that moment to return from the store. *Rescued by the villain from his sweetheart minion, that's not exactly cliche.* When Megamind saw Minion hugging Roxanne, due to himself on many occasions also being hugged by his minion, he knew she was in immediate peril.

"Minion! Let go of Roxanne right now!"

Minion suddenly remembered that he was the one who always carried Miss. Ritchi around when she was unconscious for a reason, and quickly let go. *Miss. Ritchi, if you don't mind please don't be broken.*

Roxanne coughs, which sends Megamind into a panic.

"Roxanne are you ok? Do we need to retrieve the doctor? What do we do?"

"Relax I'm fine. Humans aren't as delicate as you seem to think." *Adorable chibi villain.*

Megamind performed the face palm maneuver and sighed. *Time to get on with the plan. Hopefully this will be the all time low.* "Minion, you are fully aware of my cooking expertise, so could you?" He motioned to the bag he'd dropped.

"Of course Sir."

Roxanne gave him a questioning look. *Megamind has attempted cooking?*

"I couldn't cook to kill Metro Man. But then again the food itself might kill him, I haven't tried that method of poisoning before."

Roxanne chuckled as Megamind's face lit up with the forming evil plot. She followed when he raced to the Idea Room. *I need to be careful not to give him anymore ideas.* The smart part of her mind scolded. *But I am his evil queen now, I think. Well am I evil or not?*

After a minute of watching Megamind hang cards in the air as part of a new hanging wall Roxanne decided that she was. *In that case,*

"Megamind, why do you conceal your Idea Room with a bright red curtain?"

"To hide it just in case some of your brethren nosy reporters break in." *My reasoning for that was very weak. Oh well, it's a good opening for some banter that I will win. Come on Roxanne make me proud!*

"But it's kind of obvious that it's covering something exciting. Don't you think?"

Megamind didn't have a comeback for that. *Ok Roxanne you win, again. But I will be the inevitable victor of next round!*

Roxanne saw that he had no comeback and laughed. "I win again!" *Two victories in a row, I better fluff up his ego a bit, the enormous thing is surprisingly delicate.* "Do you want to hear my idea, or is your genius mind too fantastic for it?"

"Close, but tell me anyway."

"Relocate the red curtain so that it's concealing a trap and then use whatever it it that makes your car invisible to cover your hanging walls." *Speaking of hanging walls...*

Minion walked in. "Sir I finished dinner."

"Minion, Roxanne is a genius!" Megamind dragged Minion around the lair elaborating on her plan.

While they were distracted Roxanne took the opportunity to search for her hanging wall.

Megamind quickly realized that Roxanne hadn't followed them. *Roxanne where did you go?*

When he returned to the idea room, after giving Minion an order to play with the brain bots, he realized that he was too late.

Roxanne had some difficultly finding her hanging wall, which was no longer a hanging wall but a file full of papers and photographs, because most of their evil plans involved Roxanne and her name was part of the name for several of them.

"Roxanne?"

"What is the plan? What do you hope to gain from all of this?"

*Cursed nosy reporter skills oh how I hate you!* "Roxanne have you read it?"

"Not yet, I'd rather you told me." *What did I mean by that?*

*What did Roxanne mean by that? Oh well, I promised myself I'd be honest, but that doesn't mean I have to make it easy for her!*

He grabbed ahold of the file. "Let go it's mine!" *Roxanne stop being so strong!*

"Give it to me!" *What is so important in this thing?*

The folder tore open, scattering the contents everywhere.

"Brain Bots put those in hanging wall formation number 4971."

Roxanne watched in fascination as the Brain Bots formed the hanging wall. "Why 4971?"

"That's the number of evil plans I've thought of so far."

"But I only heard about 1,542 of them. I feel left out."

"The others were ones that we just haven't executed yet or ones we decided not to do because they were too dangerous and too likely to fail early."

Roxanne was still watching the Brain Bots. *I would hate to have seen those plans in action.* "That was really grown up by the way."

"I know."

The Brain Bots finished and, after being petted on by their Daddy and Miss. Ritchi, dispersed.

Roxanne tried reading it card by card, but she couldn't understand how it went together.

Megamind watched, smirking and appearing thoroughly pleased with himself. "Do you need some help my dear Roxanne?" *I think I said the "my" and "dear" part out loud, oops.*

"Yes, that would be nice." *Did he just call me his dear Roxanne? I really need to be very repulsed right now. Come on Roxanne, be repulsed.*

"Stand back and look at it from a distance."

Roxanne did and was not particularly surprised to see an image of herself in her current getup. "Ok, I get that part, but back to my question: what do you hope to gain from all of this?"

*Roxanne, why do you have to be so perceptive? Why can't you just look at it and accept that as your answer?* "Isn't it obvious, I want you to be my evil queen. Honestly if I didn't know any better I'd think that the last time I kidnapped you was your first day of being a reporter."

She rolled her eyes. "Do you really think that I would ever fall for that?"

"It was worth a shot." *Maybe she's distracted...*

"Spill villain!"

*Or not.* "I need five things to happen before I can call this plan a complete success."

"Which would be?" *Stop avoiding the question already!*

Megamind sighed. *Might as well get it over with.* "One request before I answer?" *And you run away screaming.*

"I reserve the right to say no." *What is wrong with Megs? Better yet, what is wrong with me! Nicknaming a super villain, if the mindless sheep that is Metrocity got a hold of that tidbit, I'd be in exactly as much trouble with them as I am now.*

"May I hug you?" *Could I sound more pathetic?*

"I kind've expected you to be a little more demanding with this, but ok."

Being hugged felt wonderful to Megamind, who was not far from being a puddle on the floor when Minion walked by.

Minion been playing with the brain bots like Megamind told him to until he heard their fight over the folder. When Minion got to where they were standing he saw Miss. Ritchi with her arms around his master, probably an attack.

This possibility was supported when Megamind saw him. Megamind was throat slash maneuvering to get Minion to leave and avoid cutting the hug short.

Unfortunately Minion took it as a sign to stop Roxanne from killing him.

"Minion!" Megamind yelled as the fish lifted him away from a laughing Roxanne.

"Yes Sir?"

**Prequel http : / / www . fanfiction . net / s / 7298958 / 4 / Megamind _ Oneshots**

**Pictures http : / / wednesdays child 45120 . deviantart . com / # / d4cqj75**


	6. Almost Everyone

**I wrote this in the time span of two days! Thank you for the comment! Please review!**

"For the last time Minion, Roxanne wasn't attacking me." Megamind said as they were walking to where Minion had set up their dinner.

"And you are sure you're ok Sir?"

Megamind appeared to be not very far from dehydrating his worried minion, so Roxanne interjected. "Minion I wasn't attacking Megamind."

He still looked unsure.

"I promise, a hug is not an attack." *Since when is Minion so protective?*

Roxanne and Megamind arrived at the table which was in the center of a darkened room. *How are we supposed to eat in the dark?*

The answer came in the form of a horde of Brain Bots that rushed past them, several stopping for pats from their Daddy and Miss. Ritchi, and loosely circled the table. The light blue glow would have been eerie if it weren't so impressive.

"Have I finally managed to impress my dear Roxanne with my instruments of evil?" *It slipped out again! Oh well, she's going to find out soon anyway, and then what?* His expansive mind filled with all of Roxanne's possible reactions, the vast majority involving screaming and fleeing. Megamind shook those thoughts off. *No, if it comes down to that I will deal with it, somehow. But in the meantime I am going to enjoy Roxanne's company for as long as it lasts.*

"Yes, have to admit it, I am thoroughly impressed."

Her answer brought him back to reality. "I did it! I've finally impressed my damsel!"

*Oh, I might as well admit it.* "I thought many of your inventions were impressive, but it wouldn't have been very responsible to compliment the doom machines you were threatening me with."

"Responsible in whose eyes? In my egotistical opinion," Roxanne could barely stifle a laugh "It would be more responsible to yourself to state your opinion no matter what everyone else thinks."

"It looks like you can be yourself more as a villain, when almost everyone hates you no matter what you do."

*Almost everyone? Could that mean what I hope it means?* "Evil has it's perks."

Minion had been standing back from them, watching for any signs of hostility. By now he was satisfied and left quietly.

They both noticed his behavior and laughed as soon as he was out of earshot.

"Is he always so protective?"

"You should have see him when we were testing the Death Ray. But now it's time for dinner." With dramatic flourish he removed the metal lid covering two bowls of Special K cereal, two baked potatoes, and two glasses of white wine.

*He made this from the items on my list from around two days ago, aww how cute.* It wasn't the fanciest meal she'd ever had, but it was the sweetest.

*My dear Roxanne is smiling, so far so good. I need to stop calling her that in my mind.* "Roxanne, you wanted to know why I am doing this plan?" Roxanne perked up. *You're reporter skills are obviously tingling.*

"Yes that would be nice."

*Here we go.* "As I told you earlier there are five things I would like to happen. Number one, and least important, I wanted you to see the true nature of people behind their masks of hypocritical goodness."

"Mission success." Roxanne said somewhat bitterly, thinking back to the crowd's sudden turn on her.

Megamind wanted to make Roxanne feel better, but he didn't know what to do, especially since the public's turn on her was technically his fault. *Time to move on to the harder ones. I really should have listed these reasons the other way around.* "Second, I want to end your relationship with Metro Man."

"Megamind, I have told you countless times,"

"4867 times actually."

"and I will tell you countless more times, Metro Man and I were never a couple." *You tune me out when I say that don't you?*

"Third, I wanted to turn you to the dark side, dun! Dun! Dun!"

"You were definitely successful with that one."

*She's still smiling and the first three are done. Now comes the hard part.* "I want you to stay in Evil Lair, I mean, if you want to." Megamind looked up to check her reaction. *She's not smiling, and the worst is still yet to come. This is not good.*

*Megamind wants me to stay with him in Evil Lair, that is dangerously close to what I think might be number five. Isn't the evil queen usually romantically involved with the super villain? Oh no, I really, really need to be incredibly repulsed right now. He's an alien for crying out loud!*

"Fifth and final," *Here goes everything.* "Over the years of playing our game I have fallen for you." He looked into Roxanne's eyes, willing her to understand. "I'm in love with you, my dear Roxanne." *Might as well say it while she's still sitting there, and not running away.* "And I'm going to do my best to get you to feel the same way."

Roxanne was overcome with shock, this revelation wasn't a surprise to her, but now that the truth was out in the open she didn't know what to do. She couldn't rightfully say that she returned his feelings completely. Roxanne knew they had chemistry, it was obvious now that it was being admitted to, but Megamind was way ahead of her in falling in love, at least for now.

Roxanne sat in a silent daze, sorting through her jumbled thoughts and feelings, most of which were all for the new development, but the smart part of her mind was putting up an argument and a half.

Megamind couldn't take her silence anymore. "Roxanne, are you ok?"

*Am I ok? The smart part of my mind has some valid points, he is an alien.*

*Oh and otherwise I'm all for it?* The smart part of her mind countered.

*Ok, why am I against becoming in love with an alien?*

*Because that kind of thing is widely considered to be immoral.*

* But I'm an evil queen, immorality comes with the territory.*

*Ok, that's out of the way, what else?*

Roxanne searched her mind and was slightly disturbed by the fact that she didn't have ay other arguments against it.

Megamind was still waiting for her answer. He ached to know what was going through her mind. *This doesn't look good.*

"I don't know what to say,"

*Well, that's not the shrieks that I was expecting, things are looking up!*

"I think I like you in that way, I know I don't hate you, but I'm not in love with you." She put her hand over his to communicate the unsaid "yet".

"I'm a patient man my dear Roxanne, I can wait. *It feels good to be able to say that out loud.*

They lapse into a semi-awkward silence.

*I might as well just ask.* "Roxanne, How do you feel about how I feel about you?"

"Well, I'm a little surprised, I mean, this is an unusual method of, dating, I guess would be the closest term."

"But you're just surprised, not angry or disgusted?" Megamind was aware that he was an alien and that society typically frowned on human alien relationships. Not to mention their previous relationship, and the fact that he was a super villain.

"Of course not."

He sighed "That's a relief to hear."

She asks questions about his inventions, himself, and Minion; and he asks all about her, her life, and her job as a reporter; until around two in the morning.

Roxanne yawned, sending Megamind, once again, into a babbling fit. "Are you ok Roxanne? Do I need to retrieve the doctor? Is it serious?"

"I'm fine, I'm just tired. What time is it?"

"It's only two am."

*Two am!* "Normal people are in bed by now. By the way, who is this doctor you keep referring to?"

*I wonder if she's going to disapprove, but I have to be honest.* "We kidnapped a doctor to help with the surgery to install your implant."

"Oh, that's, very interesting." *I wonder how much Megs scared that poor doctor.* "Speaking of which Minion allowed me to attack him earlier, I wanted to see what would happen, but the implant didn't work."

"Oh yes, about that," *This is going to destroy my villainous reputation with Roxanne, not that I've ever been that intimidating to her.* "When you turned off the implant and had your justified emotional breakdown I didn't have the heart to turn it back on completely."

"Thanks Megamind." Before she could say more she yawned again. "I really need to go to bed."

"Ok, I wasn't sure if you prefer pajamas or night gowns, so I just brought some of both from your apartment."

"Thanks." She sensed the question burning behind the surface of his statement. "I prefer night gowns."

"Thank you, good night."

"Good night Megamind."

As Roxanne got ready for bed she reviewed the day. Roxanne tried to regret the day's events, but couldn't. *Here I am, my life as I knew it is over, as of tonight I am officially dating Megamind; and I don't have the decency to regret it.* She thought as she smiled up at the ceiling. After a while she was lulled to sleep by the steady hum of machinery.

Megamind couldn't remember ever being as happy as he was now, now that the girl of his dreams knew the whole truth but still wasn't fleeing. And there was more than the fact that Roxanne wasn't running from him, she had actually agreed to go along with the plan. *My dear Roxanne, have I every told you that you are unpredictable as well as wonderful?*

"Um Sir?"

In his euphoria Megamind walked past Minion, who was previously brushing his teeth, but was now staring wide eyed at his master. "Yes Minion?"

"How was your dinner with Miss. Ritchi?" *Poor Sir, he must be hysterical.*

"Minion it was wonderful! Roxanne knows everything about the plan, and she's agreed to go along with it!"

"So she's leaving, wait what?"

"You heard me! She's agreed to date me!"

"So she's your girlfriend?" *Thank you for not hurting Sir Miss. Ritchi.*

"Girlfriend?"

"Yes, that is typical title for the female partner in a dating relationship Sir."

Megamind looked blank for a moment, then he leaped at his friend. "Minion! do you know what this means?"

"That Miss. Ritchi is your girlfriend?"

"Yes! That's exactly what it means!" Megamind skips laughing to the Idea Room.

*Maybe this isn't going to go horribly wrong after all.*


	7. Replay Daddy's Words

**The more I look at the original outline to this the more it looks like a fluffy version of Pale Blue Shadows. (Very awesome story, if you haven't read it yet you really should.) Even down to Minion telling Roxanne about Megamind being obsessed. I probably shouldn't have read that story while writing this. I'll try to get Metro Man to tell her. Any similarities in the stories is accidental. Please don't sue me. **

Megamind knew he wouldn't be able to sleep, so after Minion had shut down for the night, he started planning. He glanced at the drawer that contained the blue cube of the person that dared break into his Roxanne's apartment.

*My Roxanne, I hope I don't start saying that out loud on top of the other thing, that might be a little more than she could handle.*

He pulled out the blueprints for the Brain Bots.

*That reminds me,*

Megamind whistles for the Brain Bots who quickly mob their daddy to be petted. He recalls from memory which of them were with Roxanne during her justified emotional breakdown.

"561, replay 6:30 pm to 6:43 pm of yesterday."

Roxanne's voice came out of a speaker on the Brain Bot: ""You there! Yes you. Can you charge a phone?"

Megamind could almost see his pets doing her bidding.

"Thank You. Now 561?"

*Thanking the Brain Bots? I've never really thought about it, maybe I should start doing that.*

"You record everything you hear right?"

"Of course they do! Even primitive human communication devices have that capability!" Megamind shouted at the recording. *Honestly Roxanne! That was serious underestimation of my evil genius.*

"Good. Replay Daddy's words: turn, off, control, panel, for, Roxanne. 782, you record them."

*I warned you to be careful temptress, or that I'd have them thinking of you as mommy.* "Brain Bots, access personnel file Roxanne Ritchi. Add alias Mommy."

"Now 782 listen carefully, do not be seen by the other Brain Bots. When you go to the Control Panel Room replay the words I told you to record."

*Why didn't I think of this? My dear Roxanne, it seems that you're even more clever than I thought.*

"You have 548 unheard messages." said a strange monotonous voice.

The Brain Bot plays the bits of the angry phone calls Roxanne listened to. Megamind was writing down a list of the callers' names and numbers for use in his forming plan of vengeance.

*These people are going to pay dearly for making my Roxanne cry!*

"Roxanne this is your mother, we don't know what's gotten into you, but until you straighten up don't call us."

Megamind froze. *Did I hear that correctly?* "Brain Bot, replay the last five seconds."

561 does, and barely dodges a dehydration beam, currently set to destroy.

"How dare they be so stupid and vicious! That is completely unfair and evil!" *The evil part is my job anyway you trespassers!* He flashbacks uncontrollably to his shool days. *And now you've started a flashback sequence!*

The phone's voice shocks him out of the flashbacks. "The number you are calling is no longer available."

Megamind nearly starts crying himself at the sound of Roxanne's sobs. "561, stop the recording."

He does, but the atmosphere in the room is still tense from the recorded drama. Megamind starts mindlessly petting on the Brain Bots, it was his favorite way to relax. Suddenly a light bulb goes off in his head and Megamind starts constructing.

Megamind wakes up with his head resting on a half complete Brain Bot. *Oh no! What time is it?* He checks the desk clock. *4:54 am, good, that means I still have a good hour to finish.*

Roxanne wakes up surrounded by pink Brain Bots. *Megs, what are you up to now? And is that blood on their jaws?*

"Good morning Miss. Ritchi." Minion came in with two plates of French toast.

Megamind came in behind him. "Breakfast in bed" *My dear,* "Roxanne?" *yes! I caught it in time! Now all I have to do is keep it up, forever... hopefully.*

Minion hands Roxanne a plate and Megamind sits on the corner of the bed.

"What's with the pink Brain Bots? And is that real blood?" *Please don't let it be real blood.*

"I made them for you last night. And no it's not real blood,"

Roxanne sighed in relief.

"I acquired some fake blood to use for presentation's sake."

*How should I feel about receiving a gift covered in fake blood?* "Thanks Megs-amind." *That was close, I almost called him Megs out loud. Wait, does that mean he calls me his dear Roxanne in his mind? It would explain a lot.*

They eat in companionable silence until Megamind says, "It's time for your next horrendously evil, lesson in evil!"

Roxanne turns slightly pale at the term "lesson." Which is understandable since the first one involved becoming the single most hated person in Metrocity. *This is going to suck.*

"Roxanne?"

*Minion, for the second time, where are you when I need you?* Megamind still didn't know how to comfort her, so he tried putting a hand on her shoulder.

If Roxanne wasn't dreading the next lesson so much she would have laughed. *Megs you couldn't look more out of your element if you were trying.* "I'm fine. What's the plan?"

"The plan mostly involves vengeance." *Maybe I should've put this lesson a little further time wise away from the one that involved me destroying her life.*

"Against who?" Roxanne recalled the voice mails from her former "friends" declaring their hatred of her and winced.

Megamind saw her reaction and guessed what she was thinking about. *My dear Roxanne doesn't know that I replayed that. This honesty thing is more difficult than I thought it was going to be.* "I personally nominate those people that left those vicious messages on your phone."

*How'd Megs know about- Oh yeah, the Brain Bots record everything, wait everything?* "Do the Brain Bots record video or just audio?" *Because if they record both than that is creepy on so many levels.*

"Just audio." *Why?*

"That's a relief to hear. And I think vengeance on them is a good idea." *A very satisfying and definitely evil idea.*

"What do you want to do m-Roxanne?"

*He's really trying hard not to call me his dear Roxanne. Is that to avoid disturbing me? It doesn't, it's actually sweet in a creepy / possessive sort of way.* "Something in severity between dehydrating them and destroying them." *Though destroying them sounds awfully good.*

"How about the Goo Ray?"

"What does that do?"

"I originally designed it in an attempt to turn Metro Man into a living pile of goo. He was impervious to it-"

"Big suprise there."

"but the normal citizens of Metrocity wouldn't stand a chance."

Roxanne was smiling at the idea of everyone who'd turned on her becoming a pile of goo.

"Unfortunately the effects aren't permanent." *Has anyone told you that you're pretty when you're plotting revenge?*

Minion returned to take their plates.

"Minion, have you filtered the transformer fluid in the Goo Ray recently?"

"No Sir, you said you were planning on dismantling it because it was too evil."

Roxanne smirked at the flustered super villain.

"I didn't say that!" *Why did you talk about that in front of Roxanne? And how am I supposed to intimidate anyone with you talking about rare instances like that!*

"Sure you didn't Megs." *I have called him that in my head way too much, I hope he didn't notice it.*

Luckily for Roxanne, Megamind was too busy being angry at Minion to notice the nickname. "Roxanne you should have more confidence in my eeevilness."

Roxanne tried not to laugh, and failed miserably. "Ok, so how long till we start turning people into disgusting piles of goo?" *That will match their hearts perfectly."

"Taking warm up time into account, it will be around an hour Ma-ss. Ritchi." *I almost called her Mam out loud, I really shouldn't have been thinking of her as Mam. Even though it does correlate with her and Sir being a couple, it has become an inconvenient habit.* He remembered why he'd came and took their plates. "I'm going to start work on the Goo Ray after I wash the dishes." Minion flees the room.

"Roxanne, usually I make some appearance to the masses when I execute an evil plan. This is your revenge, so they will be expecting you."

"Your point?" *It's not like I'm going to get stage fright, but I guess this will be a little different than reporting.*

"I'm saying," *How do I put this? Oh, I know!* "PRESENTATION!"

"Megamind," *Good, it came out right, this time.* "I've observed your attempts to intimidate people, particularly me, for twenty years now."

"They were not attempts. I scared the masses all the time. But I practiced, unlike you,"

Roxanne hoped she wasn't blushing.

"I'm going to go work on the Goo Ray, Minion will give you some pointers on evil behavior."

Roxanne, followed by her personal horde of pink Brain Bots, went to find Minion. On the way, purely for the fun of it, she tried some evil cape swishing. *I wonder if Megs ever goes around Evil Lair, swishing his cape. It sounds like something he would do.*

Miss. Ritchi?" Roxanne stopped mid swish. "Hi Minion I was looking for you." Roxanne said, trying to regain some dignity. "Megamind wanted me to practice acting evil. How do you want to start?"

"Try an evil laugh."

Roxanne's laugh was so cold, dark, and evil that Minion jumped and the Brain Bots hid behind him. "Miss. Ritchi, that was wonderful!"


	8. Goo Ray

**Here's the full chapter!**

Megamind had ran into a problem with the Goo Ray when he heard Roxanne practicing evil laughter with Minion. *How'd it work out between goody two shoes and her for so long?* He wondered on his way to the lift. Megamind looked back at the Goo Ray and sighed. *Why did I invent that dimwitted creation of science?*

Roxanne and Minion were still trying to coax the most of the Brain Bots from behind Minion when Megamind got there.

"The Goo Ray simply will not work!"

"What's wrong with it?" *Please be something small, I'm really looking forward to turning everyone into goo.* Roxanne thought darkly.

"The Goo Ray itself is fine, but it won't connect to the targeting system."

*That's a relief to hear.* "I'll look at it."

"What could you possibly be able to figure out that I can't?" He was baiting her, and Roxanne knew it.

*Megs you never give up do you, even now when you have absolutly no chance of winning.* She didn't answer his question directly, instead Roxanne walked toward the observatory.

Megamind runs after her. "Roxanne! I didn't mean it! You were supposed to use it as an opening for some banter!" He turned a corner and tripped on Roxanne's foot. Megamind was about to fall, but she caught him.

"You didn't figure out that I was setting a trap, Mr. Smarter-than-thou."

"Yes I did, I just tripped on purpose."

"Sure you did. So where is the Goo Ray?"

Minion was getting better at slipping away conveniently. He'd gotten some practice over the years when things got awkward, which was often, but now he was slipping away every time he turned around. "I should have prepared myself for this." He tells a Brain Bot.

Roxanne quickly solves the problem with the Goo Ray, to Megamind's chargrin and puzzlement. "How did you do that?" *Roxanne, if I hadn't already ran several tests on you to check if you were really human...*

"You're firewall is so powerful it prevented your Goo Ray from pairing with the computer and therefore the targeting system." Roxanne gave him that backhanded compliment because she knew he wasn't happy with how easily she fixed the problem.

"Ok, let's contact your boyfriend in tights and get this show on the road!"

"He's not my boyfriend." Was her automatic response.

"Minion code: call metro Man."

Roxanne for once was impatient with Minion. He was moving too slowly and she wanted to get on with turning the mindless sheep of Metrocity into goo.

Megamind saw her impatience and smirked. "The sweet lovely reporter wouldn't actually be excited by the prospect of such an ignoble deed as turning the good citizens of metrocity into goo, would she?"

"All the way." Roxanne was half vibrating with excitement slash impatience. *Minion could you be going any slower?*

"We should probably go ahead and start so we can goo-ify the most people before Metro Man gets here." They let the Goo Ray heat up and prepared to fire. Megamind is watching Roxanne swivel in the Evil Swivel Chair. "How does it feel Roxanne?"

She stops swiveling in the Evil Swivel Chair long enough to look up at him confused. "How does what feel?"

"Being two seconds away from revenge upon the people that betrayed you." He specified. *Even though that's technically my fault.*

Roxanne didn't know what to tell him without disturbing him, so she settled on the truth. *His reaction surely wouldn't be that bad; he must feel the same way at the beginning of the execution of every evil plan.*

Roxanne knew alittle about his brief time at school. She had read the official reports about a evil little boy that terrorized the school, despite the teacher's best efforts to encourage him to be good. And how his time there had ended when he brought a bomb to school and Wayne Scott had saved the school by flying it away from the bomb.

But Roxanne knew better. She had interviewed several of Megamind's former classmates, all saying that it was a blue paint bomb. She also found Megamind's school pictures that depicted a normal classroom, with a blue alien boy holding his fish standing apart from the rest. That picture on its own completely blew the official report's story apart for Roxanne. All that and what she knew of Megamind's character told her a different story, one that would give Megamind more than enough reason to lash out at society, and make it very reasonable for him to have become much worse than he was. "It feels like a rush, like I'm trying to appease my rage. Like I need to make them pay, and prove them right."

Megamind knew how she felt, when he first went into villainy he was mostly focused on proving to everyone that he was as evil as they thought.

The indicator on the Goo Ray changed to red. "The Goo Ray is done warming up." Megamind announced.

Roxanne half ran over to him.

"Do you care who you turn into goo?" *Because if you don't I have a few suggestions.*

Roxanne didn't have to think about it. "Not really, any citizen of metrocity will do."

Megamind starts targeting randomly, but mostly around Roxanne's apartment and Channel 8 headquarters since that was probably where most of her former friends were.

Roxanne fired giddily until the Goo Ray indicator said 'cooling down'.

They waited around for Metro Man to show up, but after a few minutes when he didn't they started getting worried.

"Did you target him?" Roxanne asked, still coming down from her roaring rampage of revenge.

"I targeted him, but naturally it didn't work." Megamind brought his watch to his face. "Minion, did you call Metro Man?"

"Yes Sir. He said he was too busy with damage control to come."

Megamind was apalled, Metro Man always showed up to fight him before starting damage control. "That's so unprofessional!"

"I know Sir." Minion didn't really understand why Megamind was so disapointed that his nemisis wasn't coming to arrest him for the millionth time. Minion was relieved that he wasn't going to have to fix another wall or ceiling.

"So, what do you want to do now?" Roxanne asked, her voice perfectly normal. She knew she should be drowning in self loathing and guilt right about now. And that the smart part of her mind should be screaming at her for turning half the citizens of metrocity into goo. Instead Roxanne felt vindictive satisfaction and was intrigued by the idea of making the other half of the citizens match.

Megamind was in a similar mood. He had targeted many of the people who had dared send those awful messages to his evil queen. Roxanne still looked happy with what they just did, which was a bit of a shock to Megamind. He'd expected for her to have a harder time commiting her first act of villainy. *How did I ever think that Roxanne and Metro Man were dating?*

Megamind thought that since they pretty much shut down metrocity for the week they didn't really need to do any more damage today. "We could watch a movie." He suggested.

Chilling in front of a tv after devestating metrocity sounded appealing to Roxanne, so they went down to what passed as a living room. There was a tv, a couch and two stacks of dvds.

Megamind went to one stack and Roxanne, to his horror, went to the other one. *Minion! Why did you have to leave those out?*

"What are these?" Roxanne looked at the labels and saw that they were all named after large public events, most of them involving Metro Man.

"I record the news reports on events to help plan my attack so that the most news channels will see it." *Yeah, that's a good explanation that doesn't sound like stalking.*

Roxanne doesn't believe thats the entire reason behind it. "What percent of those reports are mine?" She smiles when he gives her a deer in the headlights look.

"About 75 percent." Megamind conceded. *So much for not stalking.*

They go over to the other stack of movies. Roxanne immediatly notices many movies that she owned, but she could tell that they weren't her copies. "You have the same movies I do." She noted out loud, hoping for an explanation other than Megamind being into both horror and romance films.

"I was hoping to find out why you never screamed." He explained. They pick out Resident Evil to watch. Megamind watched as Roxanne smiled while watching the movie. Under a month ago he would have never imagined that this would happen in a million years. He was distracted from this train of thought when suddenly the wall beside Roxanne suddenly exploded.

**Finally, a little bit of action. And about Roxanne's movies, she just strikes me as the kind of person who would like some from all genres. It would explain how she can spot cliches a mile away. Please review!**


	9. Forgetting The Script

**Long time no update. This chapter introduces Metro Man, and in every fic I've read involving an evil Roxanne Metro Man gets bashed, so I decided to do something different. Please review! **

_**Last time on Evil Queen:** Suddenly the wall beside Roxanne suddenly exploded._

Megamind and Roxanne jump off the couch; Megamind pulls out his De-gun and Roxanne pulls out her wrench that she'd kept. *I really should have gotten My dear Roxanne her own de-gun by now.* Megamind thought grimly.

"Relax, I'm just here to talk." Metro Man didn't bother acknowledging their weapons.

"What about?" Megamind was scared, one word from Roxanne and Metro Man would happily reduce him to a bloody stain on the floor. Sure she had gone along with everything up to now in her standard must-make-Megamind-look-bad style. But now with help four feet away Megamind didn't know what she would do.

Roxanne felt Megamind stiffen next to her, and when she turned to him she could plainly see terror in his eyes. When she figured out why she couldn't help but feel a little hurt. *How could Megs believe that I would sic Metro Man on him?* Despite her resolve, the smart part of her mind still argued. *It would be so easy to make all of this go away. A few words and I have my life back. No longer public enemy number 2.*

"I'm here to make sure your evil queen is ok." Metro Man stated simply.

"M- Roxanne is fine." Megamind said tensely. *Please just buy that and leave.*

Metro Man wasn't keen on taking the villain's word for it. "Well I need to verify that for myself. Privately."

The yelled "NO!" was out of Megamind's mouth immediately. There was no way in a million years that he would leave his dear Roxanne alone with the hero, not that he would be able to stop him if Metro Man decided to arrest his ex-girlfriend. *But I could always threaten Metro Tower again.*

If Metro Man wasn't indestructible Roxanne would have feared for his safety. "Maybe it would be better if we talked here." She hinted, hoping Metro Man would understand. During the years Roxanne spent as Megamind's favorite kidnapee she had gradually adopted the villain's opinion of Metro Man's intelligence.

Metro Man saw the potential fire fight in the situation, and even though being shot by a de-stroy beam didn't hurt him it still wasn't pleasant. "Fine, let's talk here."

Megamind practically walked backwards as he left. Panic had rendered him incapable of forming complex sentences. *Roxanne knows her ex-boyfriend. Roxanne is smart. Roxanne wouldn't stay alone with him if she thought he would hurt her.*

Shortly afterwards a swarm of Brain Bots "discreetly" slipped into the room, ready to whisk Roxanne away on a moments notice.

"Thanks for understanding. Megs is a bit overprotective." She deliberately used the nickname in a bid to put Metro Man more at ease.

Metro Man put a hand over his face while he tried to gather his thoughts into a coherent sentence. "I'm gone for a few weeks and you and Megamind turn half of the citizens of Metro City into goo." He stated flatly.

"Don't worry Metro Man, unfortunately enough the effects aren't permanent." Roxanne was unable to completely hide the traces of resentment in her tone.

Metro Man gave her a long look, like he was trying to use his laser vision. And considering what she and Megamind did to Metrocity earlier Roxanne wouldn't have been too surprised if that were the case. *It's a good thing Megamind had some Brain Bots come in here. And that they, unlike almost everything else Megs has invented, don't need to warm up.*

"Megamind has offered you the position of evil queen many times. What changed that made you accept this time?" He asked.

*Hmm, that's a tough question to answer without Metro Man annihilating Megs.*

The Brain Bots took Roxanne's nervousness as a sign that she was in danger. Metro Man fought the impulse to zap the Brain Bots, which were currently firing every weapon they had at him while others whisked Roxanne out of the room.

Apparently his rival considered the Brain Bots to be some sort of pets. Metro Man didn't really understand it, to him the annoying things were machines with advanced AI, nothing more. But destroying them caused Megamind to act more like the serious, lethal villain Metro Man knew he could be if he wanted, and Megamind was plenty erratic without his help, especially now.

Roxanne, for the first time in a long time, was in a true panic. *Metro Man is a few minutes from finding out about what Megs did concerning a certain piece of metal and my brain. Not good.* By now the Brain Bots had dropped her in front of Megamind. "Megs, Metro Man wants to know what happened to bring us to this point. What should I say?" *I'm going to have to work on his ego after this.*

Megamind stared at Roxanne panicked. *That's what I was planning on asking you dear.* Despite their dire situation he couldn't help his mind from adding the habitual affectionate adjective at the end.

"The truth would be a good place to start." Metro Man said from the doorway. "Aw come on guys, you look like just said that I was about to cut Evil Lair off it's foundation, lift it a hundred feet in the air, and put it back upside down."

Roxanne closed some of the distance between her and Megamind to try to reassure him before his eyes fell out. "That's a pretty specific plan." She said to Metro Man, hoping to distract him long enough to come up with a plan.

"I was thinking about doing just that when your boyfriend in capes threatened to blow up Metro Tower."

Roxanne turned and looked at Megamind in a mixture of incredulity and horror.

Megamind scrambled to explain himself while the back of his mind was working furiously to come up with a plan to avoid being massively over-killed. "One of my brilliant plans to destroy Metro Man failed,"

"No!" Roxanne interjected with a look of mock disbelief. If asked by anyone whose opinion she truly cared about, which was starting to be in short supply these days, Roxanne would have said that that was a strategic move to buy more time. In reality, verbal warfare with Megamind was a reflex.

*Nice one Roxanne.* "Minion and I were sent back to prison via Metro Man air, someone had the genius idea to try and cut open Minion's bowl, so I broke out, saved Minion, and insured that he would never be in that situation again." Megamind stated simply, but Roxanne could hear the underlying emotion in his words. *I shouldn't think that Megs threatening to blow up a couple thousand people to save Minion is adorable. Either there is something really wrong with me or Megs knew what he was talking about when he said that I'd make a good evil queen.*

"This is the part where I say that that is no excuse and some other justicy stuff, but I'm not feeling it today. Now are you going to tell me what you've been up to during the past month, or are you going to keep changing the subject." Metro Man could partially understand their reaction to him, after all he was the hero of the city that they had just gooified. Despite this he wasn't angry; ok maybe a little irritated, between damage control, averting mass panic, and trying to justify not killing the villain before he did something worse, he was going to have a long couple of weeks. But he was still here purely to get a grasp on the situation and make sure Roxanne was ok. *Come on Roxy, I've been 'rescuing' you from my little buddy several times a week for almost two decades. And Megamind, sure you've been trying to kill me for as long as I can remember and I've been thwarting you're creative plans to take over Metro City for just as long, but I've always kind've looked past all that to see the weird little friendship we got going on. I'm not going to throw that away for some good PR.*

Minion conveniently walked in just then. "Sir, Miss. Ritchi, I thought you might like some cookies with your movie." He looked up from his precariously balanced tray of cookies and noticed his master's arch rival. "Oh, hello Metro Man. Would you like some cookies," Minion then felt the tension in the room. *Great, looks like there's going to be more slipping away quietly in my future.* "if that's ok?"

Roxanne looked at Megamind, who still looked like he was two seconds away from a panic attack. "Yes, I believe this conversation is definitely going to require some cookies."

**I mean it, the R button doesn't bite too hard, usually. :) **


End file.
